Out of the Fire

I did not take my exit point

The second time the chance has befallen upon me

According to Sylvia Browne, I have five

All I wanted to do was return to being alive

To take things day by day with that dumb kid who seduced me off of my feet

It was not as though I was weak

I was willing, and quite strongly so, as I recall

Perhaps it was all too much for my heart

For my soul

In my head

He had the gaul to call  himself "The Godfather"...

What balls he had to try and take on such a powerful name

He has never been the same guy since right around then

I can only go by the sensations that I get now, whenever I allow my thoughts to claim him

I just recently received a random message on Face Book that informed me that he has come up missing

I suppose that it may be part of his punishment

He had never forgiven himself, last time I heard or can remember

Of course, so much has gone down since his love had me taken over so mercilessly and unnecessarily so

I had already promised him everything that he ever could have imagined and it all got so ruthlessly declined

He decided instead that he would just try to take it all on his own accord sometime or two or three or more when he did things without me knowing

He became a tireless, low-down sneak which is not much better than a liar, as far as I am concerned

I still, to this moment, feel liken incinerating everything in my wake with the fire that I naturally breathe

Just one of the many things that can happen when I am so suddenly submerged back into that thief they call love

A shock to the system, you could say

I seem to find my way through it every single time and each time it becomes easier and easier

To never allow yourself to fall is a crime of the heart, however obvious may be what may become of  you in the aftermath of it all

Stronger, I know from experience you will be for certain and yes, that increases each time that it is faced

It all feels so foreign in some way and that something is out of place

Then, familiarity takes over what remains of your concern

So, you go along with your instinct to walk out of the fire before it has the chance to burn you again...

4/20/2013