The Retired Bloke

Pedro

Now Pedro isn’t an ugly lad

My wife and other ladies drooling

Is more than testimony to that 

He’s got a great sense of humour especially when he’s fooling 

 

And frightening folk with the length of the walk

Or saying it will be an age to dinner

Extolling the virtues of Porto in every talk

His incessant Dad jokes always a winner. 

 

To prevent the gang from frazzling

On a trip down 700 steps from a sanctuary 

Whilst in his one armed Ray Bans dazzling

Fresh clothing  is always a necessity

 

On nights out Pedro has to look smart

For him it’s clearly no fiesta

When to set him apart

They make him wear a cheap suit made of polyester. 

 

Pedro revelled at the opportunity

After a couple of choice wines and a port

For the chance to deliver the itinerary 

For our following day afloat

 

Now the cooking demonstration intrigued me

When he said the last chefs name was pissed off

Something got lost in translation you see

As I think his name was actually Christoph

 

On the bus home it was quite interesting

When he started to sing to be fair

A song sung in falsetto quite amusing 

From his favourite idol Carmen Miranda 

 

Now I don’t know whether he was serious 

When he invited us all to his hostel in Porto 

But I knew my Mrs felt quite delirious 

At the thought of seeing our  leader Pedro. 

 

So without further ado I’d like to thank the lad

For making the tour so much fun

For I am truly grateful and glad

For all the Douro facts that he’s given us in the sun.