bethgrace

Ad Block

I feel like my brain has put an ad block on emotion

And when I try to reach out for you I see a pop up warning me that No! This function cannot be accessed whilst an Ad Block is in use.

So, I try to uninstall and reset the browser but I wake up just the same.

An empty shell of technology, faulty wiring falling into the hands of those without the qualifications to find the on-switch.
A brain both in standby and overworking, an overheating of wired vessels working overtime to provide life to a barely-functional heart.

The quiet murmur of my breathing the only reminder that there is still something behind the blank screen.

You try to keep your patience but I know you want to just throw me to the wall, an excuse to replace my shattered interface with the newest model.
A model that doesn’t feel like it takes them 3 years to get out of bed every morning, a model that doesn’t seem to contract a new virus every day.

Maybe I’m just tired, maybe I’ve run my course, maybe I’ve accidentally encountered malware. Maybe I am the malware.

Or maybe, my brain has put an Ad Block on emotion.

And when I try to reach out for you I see a pop up warning me that No! This function cannot be accessed whilst an Ad Block is in use.