Where is my mind
Slowly losing myself
Thought I was lucky
All I had was pain
People think I\'m strong
And maybe that\'s true
But life\'s not that easy
I\'m not what I seem
I know there\'s always worse
Why does that make it ok
I\'m not sure anymore
What\'s there to gain
I guess I\'m just tired
Of always holding on
I think I\'ve got control
But I\'ve never had luck
I\'m falling apart
Yet no one sees
They say I\'ll be ok
Cause that\'s how it\'s been
Is that really true
Each year I get worse
I may have learned to hide it
Doesn\'t mean that it\'s gone
I\'m not ok
Why can\'t they understand
Yes, it won\'t kill me
But it\'s still a burden
The stones get heavier
As time carries on
Put on a smile
That\'s all they want
I\'m not trying to hurt you
It\'s just how I feel
I know I said don\'t dwell
But sometimes it\'s hard
The difference is though
I\'ll never give up
I\'m true to my word
I don\'t plan to stop
I just want a break
Guess that won\'t happen
The pile gets bigger
I need more strength
It\'s not about winning
Although I wish I could
It\'s about the fight
The one that never ends
There\'s a saying that goes
If it doesn\'t kill you
Then you\'ll get stronger
But all I feel is weak
They think it\'s not that bad
Maybe it\'s not
Again there\'s always worse
But I feel like I\'m lost
I\'m not scared of death
Just the before
The parts where you lose
Who you really are
It\'s seems that\'s happening
Faster than it should
I\'m only 17
And I\'m losing my mind
My brain is me
I can\'t handle this
What do I do
I\'m terrified
Sounding dramatic
But that\'s how it feels
I can\'t focus on anything
And I just want to cry
I\'m so angry at the world
It\'s all just against me
Then I think (stop moping,
There\'s ALWAYS worse)
ALWAYS worse
That\'s the phrase
I mean It\'s true
But isn\'t that sad
Why should there be worse
Just to make me feel better
It doesn\'t really work
I just get irritated
I know I\'m not the only one
Which is screwed up enough
I\'m so tired of this life
Is it really worth the pain
The answer is yes
Still really sucks
Death is easier
But not happier
There\'s so much happy
If we just try to focus
Sometimes that\'s hard
And that\'s ok
Even though I get angry
When people say I\'ll be ok
It\'s actually true
If I allow it to be
I won\'t ever be ‘ok\'
But who really is
Life gives as much as it takes
If we choose to see it