Sometimes I think the hardest thing
a preacher has to do
is know the sermon stopping point
and simply say:
\"I\'m through\".
\"That\'s it\".
\"No more\".
\"I\'ve told you all I know\".
You\'d think a preacher would be taught
the rudimentary skill
of bringing sermons to a close
before the people start to doze
and fall out of the pews.
But the problem here -
clear as a bell -
is most preachers are very happy to tell
far more than they really know.
It takes time, you see,
to reach point 23
in a measly half an hour.
A word of caution, if you will.
The phrase \"Now one more thing...\"
can cause one\'s heart to leap and sing
because the sermon\'s near the end.
But back up just a step, my friend.
There is no guarantee
that \"one more thing\" might really be
the last and final word.
The same is true with other terms
like \"as I close\" or \"I\'ll summarize\".
But worst of all, the cruelest joke
is \"in conclusion then\".
You may as well sit back and grin
send out for pizza,
take a spin,
call up your mother\'s sister Gwen,
shoot the breeze then check again
the prospect of an end.