Nostalgia.
What a dirty liar
the way you alter memories
to make them seem happier than they were
making it harder for me
to move on.
I’ve been stuck on two of you
for quite some time.
For one,
it’s been two years.
We just drifted
for reasons I can never be certain.
I wish I knew why you left me behind.
All our silly jokes
and spontaneous trips together.
All our random photo shoots
and late night rants.
What happened?
Was it the new girl?
Did you no longer need me?
Why didn’t you try to keep in contact?
I will never be able to ask
what I so deeply want to understand.
For two,
you are more recent.
6 months and adding.
I hurt you
and I won’t ever be able to apologize enough.
You hurt me,
but I don’t blame you for what you did.
I still talk so highly of you
and speak of stories on stories
of memories from the past.
Like how we use to rate our Black Mirror episodes
and take walks even in the cold.
How we would spend all night doing nothing,
yet everything.
All the shows we binged
and those stupid stand ups we watched.
Two good friendships gone
for reasons I do not understand
or can no longer fix.
I am trying to move forward,
but late at night
when nothing else surrounds me
but my thoughts,
I reminisce of the past.
Nostalgia.