Canticle

9 Years Old

I\'ve lost my inspiration,

There is nothing left,

I can\'t think,

I can\'t sleep,

Why won\'t the pain stop?

Why must I suffer daily?

What do you want from me?

Am I not paying enough attention?

Do you want me to grow?

How can I when all of me is gone?

I just want to die, I don\'t want to be alive.

Go ahead and call me a coward and say I\'m not strong.

I\'m depressed, I\'m stressed.

No medicine could cure what\'s the test as drugs,

I just need extra love,

and that even isn\'t enough.

I guess i\'m not the ordinary people of John Legend.

I\'ve been suicidal since the age of nine.

I was told to take it one day at a time,

dammit look at me now.

Pens out of ink, what am I thinking?

Selfishness and sadness and anger and guilt?

That\'s all I\'m going to bring to them.

I\'m tired of being sad, I want to be happy.

I miss the feeling, it sounds dramatic,

but its about to get traumatic.