So this is new...
What is it?
the loss,
the weary,
the cost,
I\'m cheery.
It\'s unusual for me to be happy,
It\'s been so long,
I forgot how it feels,
I feel like I could run to hong kong.
After all this time,
its built up for this.
I can\'t explain, but I can\'t tell if I like it.
Do I miss the pain?
It felt like I had meaning for once.
Where I could use my joy to help others,
but now I feel like doing the opposite.
I feel selfish, I feel like I don\'t deserve it.
Suddenly I\'m anxious,
as if this \"good feeling\"
makes me feel worse.
What is this?
The walls!
Why are they closing?
I scream for help,
no one answers.
I go for the way out,
It won\'t budge.
Why? Why? Why?
I can\'t take it.
Hey!
That\'s too close! Get away!
Why are you grabbing me?
What is this? Why am I here? Who are you?
I can\'t see! Please leave me alone!
YOU CANT CONTROL ME!
Abruptly,
there is a light.
Shall I follow?
Shall I rot in darkness?
Or discover the unknown?
The light somehow feels dark.
Again: I am grabbed.
Let go! Why must you do this!
It guides me with force,
Dragging me down,
I try to fight,
but I am not strong,
a hand reaches out from the light for help,
I reach,
but I slip,
the darkness drags me down.
I fall to my knees and give up,
All of the sudden,
My wrists,
they bleed,
my skin,
is pale.
Where am I? I ask,
no response.
I cry,
with no tears.
My legs,
they\'re chained, I reach to unlock them,
but I am stuck.
It\'s hot, its dark...
I\'m so scared.
What have I done?
Why have I let these demons control me?
They used the darkness and my fear to drag me to HELL!
And here I sit with pain yet again.
And I realize how much I miss the happiness.
I wake,
a knife in my hand,
against my wrist.
Almost some blood.
The knife falls,
me along with it.
I scream,
no one heard it,
I cry,
no one heard it,
I scream again,
no one heard it.
I stop and remember,
I\'m home alone.
They aren\'t here,
Thank god. I was so close.
I couldn\'t imagine what they would think,
how I came so close.
I think, what a good mood.