Zinny

I think I should like to...

Today i shovel

Food,

Hunger,

Fill the void.

Yesterday,

Nothing.

A glass of rum,

Tears.

I think i should like to...

Please.

 

Empty wailing in silent car.

Fuck Fuck Fuck

Why me?

Sickness,

Pain.

I had no choice.

Walls are closing

In.

I think i should like to...

Help me.

 

You are all

There for me,

And yet

No one is.

And so i claw

At skin

And cut

My hair.

I think i should like to...

Stop this.

 

My cheek

Is raw.

My hand comes sharp

Across

The flesh.

Distraction

Is beautiful

Agony.

I think  should like to..

I want to...

 

I just wanted

To be happy.

Why

Has this happened?

My soul

Is heavy,

My essence 

Is tired.

I think i should like to...

Die