I have reached for you many times
My arms have held the empty air, hoping you were there
I have shed the tears to make a river
Hoping you would float to me
I have dreamt of you alive
My heart has shattered each time
I saw the gray
I met you
But I don’t remember you
Am I worthy
I keep your things that hide in the attic
I inhale your possessions as if your scent clung on under the dust
I got low
So I could reach high
To touch your face
I have tried to live
In hopes of you seeing
You come to mind each time my door pops open
Because nothing is outside my door with the force
I look at pictures but I wet them with my tears
I listen to the same stories over and over
I have your nose, your hands, your humor
I have artificial memories
And I have the woman you love
And I’m your joy
And yet nothing will fill the void you made when you left
t.b.