Aa Harvey

The empty hand

The empty hand

Life is a black hole and I am forever falling deeper.

Down I go into a light-less hole, no sign of my keeper.

I would say it is nice to see you, but all is mist inside the deep.

When there is no vision to guide my hands, for you I cannot reach.

I reach out into the nothingness and I return not a man.

I cannot give thanx for this cryptic master plan.

I become part of the space between reality and this place.

Forever sucked into the next realm where time has been misplaced.

If I ever return, I will only be love’s skeleton;

No nourishment can sustain my soul when I exist inside oblivion.

As the memories of me fade, in this wide open space;

I cannot recall what a smile is when I see it appear on your face.

It has been so long since I last saw a miracle,

That I do not recall how to make my smile actual.

I must have imagined it when I was a kid;

A head of fantasy creations, like happiness and bliss.

Sure you people talk of love and it sure does sounds nice,

But I can only speak of the love that doesn’t exist in my life

And good things don’t happen in front of my eyes.

I never got to feel what marriage was meant to really be,

Because I am surrounded by my apathy in this reality.

There are dreams, of course, like that dream where I was loved,

But dreams are not real; people are not enough.

They are separate entities; none will ever join me hand in hand.

I will never be standing matrimonally;

Love does not have me in its plans.

I make up words that do not exist,

Like truth and trust, this twaddle is twixt.

The meaning is lost on the journey between foolishness and death.

All this nonsense is irrelevant to a dreamer head.

This bed has no place for another to fit,

For I have never ever been seen to be fit;

So all I do is sleep in it.

Boy am I tired of living this life.

Can I not just grow up and become someone who shines?

It’s been so cold without a woman in my heart.

I have kept her spot warm; waiting in the dark.

I am a single particle in the great mass of the universe.

What chance do I have of meeting my equal; my poetic verse?

What chance do I have of communicating with her,

On a chemical level,

On an intellectual level,

Or any level at all?