My body stopped being a temple
long before your kisses swallowed me whole
and your fingers learned all my curves
from the inside out
before drugs and drink
and self destruction
my body stopped being a temple
when i was four years old
and he laid eyes on me for the first time
when he lured me into his bedroom
my body learned what it felt like to be the walls of Jericho
i learned to be the falling tree that doesn\'t make a sound
my God must of thought I was a rock
but I am just a pillar of salt
spent too much time looking over my shoulder
not enough time watching for on coming traffic
i crash straight into the ones I should avoid the most
the impact
breaks my body into puzzle pieces left in the bedrooms of strangers
I leave no at the door cause no one listens any way
people only want to hear im fine
\"its been 18 years
you are fine\"
\"you were too young to remember,
you are fine\"
\"it happened to me too
forget it
move on
you are fine\"
but all that taught me
was to be a polite victim
dont scream out
dont cry where people can see you
dont talk about it because it makes people uncomfortable
this subject is taboo
disgraceful
something to be swept under the rug and forgotten about
because you could ruin his life
so when I was raped
I followed what I was taught
said no
but didn\'t make a scene
quietly let him break
the glass ribcage i had built to protect myself
and bury my voice with out an X to mark the spot
when i told some one a year later
they said \"well maybe you shouldn\'t have drank
you put yourself in these situations and expect no to save you\"
i expect \"No\" to save me
because I am human
My body is not a forbidden fruit to be taken when no one is looking
I am not bank with the doors left open and a sleeping security guard
I am human
I deserve to have my \"No\" respected
I
deserve
to
be
respected
\"NO\" is not just a word
It is the tipping point where you show whether you recognize me as a person
It is the embodiment of whether you see me as an equal
or just an object of pleasure
whether i consent or not
\"No\" is the most powerful weapon I have
In a world where I have been taught
that politeness is a virtue
and so is silence