thewayiwrite

The way I write

I wish I wrote the way I thought

Madly

Passionately

Obsessively

Never pausing to take a breath

Never slowing

Never stopping

I wish I wrote the way I thought

With days spent wishing every hour away so that it would reach the night

So that the darkness could take away the sun and allow me to be free

I wish I wrote the way I thought

Every word would be enthralling

Electrifying

Terrifying

Every letter would be like magic

And I would spin such beautiful tales of sadness and woe and beauty and light

And I would write myself into these magnificent lies to the point of complete breakdown before I finally paused for a breath

And then when I finally do pause,

I would never write again because I would lift my head and see you and my thoughts and my words would melt to nothingness and every waking moment would be completely consumed by the manuscripts and the monologues of me and they would tumble off the table and grab the legs of my desk like tentacles, trying to claw me back into the world that I had created but I would drop my pen and I would see

Only you

In my head and on every page.

There you are.

Because if I wrote the way I thought

I would write far too often

Far too deeply

for far too long

And the words would become scrawls, illegible until the reader finally reaches the one word that is repeated over and over again and that, that my love, is you.