honestly its been difficult without you.
difficult is an understatement.
i was so young and didnt understand why this was happening to you.
after a few years i lost my faith to god because i met someone randomly one day who knew you and shared the same experience as you did.
but that person had survived.
thats when i started to ask god so many times why didnt my mom live too?!
later i found out why.
god has a plan for everyone.
god had a plan for you.
you fulfilled gods plan to the fullest.
you did everything you were meant to experience, accomplish, and live for in life.
you married the love of your life, you raised a beautiful family of 5, you taught us how to love, you gave us all of your support and love, you knew what was best for us!
people think once a loved one has passed, that they are gone and no longer with them.
thats not it at all.
my mom is with me and everyone she loved every single day.
watching over us.
guiding us through life, supporting us through the hard times that no one else sees or knows.
i cant believe its been 5 years.
i grew up so much since then.
i always told myself...
\"i wish she was there to see me graduate 8th grade\"
\"i wish she was there to hug me every time i needed her\"
\"i wish she was there to come pick out all of the dresses i wore for all the dances\"
\"i wish she was there to see me walk across the stage at graduation and tell me shes proud of me\"
but little did i realize, she was always there.
everywhere i went, every big or little step i took to become who i am today.
she was always there even if i couldnt see her.
and i know now that she will still be with me everyday and that will never change.
today is not just a sad day, its a day to remind yourself to cherish everything and everyone you have in your life.
i could say so much more but id end up writing a whole book.
i miss and love you with all my heart mom!
i hope you celebrate this 5 year anniversary of when god took you up to heaven so he could heal all of your pain and illness.
everyone reading this, dont take anything for granted! <3