Losing balance in a pool of pain
Surrounded by subtle waves
With a hidden secret of quicksand
Just needed to stay afloat but needed a hand
On my tippy toes in kiddie pools
Look at this fool
Am I drowning, again?
As if I was 4, again
Reaching as far up as I could with doubt
Just the rim of my finger tip
All while dreaming,
And praying for a savior grip
A touch, again
The sunset above the water line is reassuring
Reaching is done
Now standing firm in my foundation so we are one
I can take a breath now too
Holding on almost took me down too
I can rest now too
Consistently inconsistent
You were supposed to show us how to be loved
I didn’t get enough -
Love enough
Wasn’t enough
Thinking of the next I love you letter later
The next I miss you letter later
The future I need you letter later
Became many crumbled letters later
Irreparably consistently inconsistent
Can’t wonder how you’ll hurt us next because -
Absence wasn’t our story
Our sentences were unfinished
Punctuation causing miscommunication
Pages ripped down the middle
So many faded stories
Most I’ll never hear at bedtime -
Again?
Questions with infinite answers
Yet none -
Resolutions we were unintentionally ignorant to
That was our story
Captivating yet disappointing
Here’s my short poem- Dear, the man who was supposed to teach me love:
I -
got enough
love enough
am enough