I hated that moment when...
Deep down...
I knew...
I had been tossed into the rapids of a beating heart without a float...
No chance of survival...
No chance of redemption for my shattered soul...
What clued me in...
Maybe my stone cold frozen heart...
Maybe my tired new life...
Maybe the hell of silence I was in...
Maybe the reflections I had from before...
That moment before...
I had been tossed into the rapids of a beating heart without a float...
Is what clued me in...
My frozen heart wasn’t present then...
But, the beauty of my smile instead...
I wasn’t forever alone...
Grasping for someone’s hands...
I wasn’t fighting for the respect I deserved...
Yet never received...
Deep down...
I wish...
I could go back to the real me...
The me who could stand rock solid during danger...
The me who knew who my friends were...
The me who had respect from all...
The me who stepped up for others...
Sadly...
I owe you...
For filling up my life with...
Scars...
Painful choices...
Betrayal...
And a myriad of emotions...
Thank you, because of you...
Your betrayal...
Has been a game changer...
For my new life...
And the new me...