Yours truly shirked fidelity regarding faithful vows
bequeathed courtesy angel of mercy,
who pledged her troth
July twenty fifth nineteen ninety six
five months (not quite to the day) before
\"star student\" birthed
on December twenty second,
(now gainfully employed
at Certified B-Corporation
San Francisco, California).
The missus madder than a raging (red) bull
visa vis upon discovering mine absence
(cuz I slept in the basement
at 724 Railroad Avenue)
how wretched and dull
being married and celibate,
hence yours truly sought full
fill mint outside the marriage,
yet unbeknownst to this husband
an automatic, fatalistic,
and opportunistic hull
king, quaking, and vociferating wife
gave me a thrashing tongue lashing harangue
verbal dressing down, I betrayed,
coveted another woman
flaunted sacred pact and will (as good as) hang
which sexual imbroglio,
albeit (nocturnal escapade) did boomerang
in earshot of both our young daughters virgin ears,
thus a sudden pang
to exit the scene arose up inside me
courtesy wishful trapdoor to appear suddenly,
(whereby regarding floorboards)
from out mine overactive imagination sprang
open to usher, and/or time travel back
to earlier that fateful night rather than lang
whooshing amidst livid rage
self serving deserved fiery emasculation,
the noose hence I did stage,
experiencing withering, twittering,
snapchatting, kickstarting blistering
expletive laced epithets think
ready to burst pressure cooker
evincing dangerously hot level gauge
driving figurative wedge
between me family
courtesy foaming at the mouth spouse
(of course deux progeny affected)
renting asunder and rendering hollow
thee justice of the peace
gordian tied, uttered,
vouchsafed worded oath I did pledge.
Divorce prematurely ejaculated,
yet instantaneously dismissed
no more pleasant alternative spewed versus
contracting cankerous cyst
analogous to toxic mother
of our two offspring hissed
disparaging me directly linkedin
with promiscuous tryst
me honestly, lamely, meekly
justifying philandering gist
cuz gal methought
(good idea mister casanova wannabe),
which came as soliloquizing aside
to exchange as bartered bride
thine scorned wife,
who would relentlessly chide
(even long after the day I died)
heard thru tomb harrows coffin
abominable behavior, I do readily admit
figuratively found me electrified
what with raging testosterone nsync with
hormonal secretion my guide
erotic gamboling, I chose not to hide
never back once black traipsing inside
double entendre meant
viz yule eyes joyride.