I got everything I wanted
When I say that I\'m not talking about things worth in gold
As I do have those things too
Life is all to heavy to get to enjoy such blessings
To be able to truly enjoy life
All due to me
I once prayed to never cry
To die faster then I will ever know
NOW
I never know if I will wake up with lungs filled with air
I prayed to God when I was younger
I never took him seriously
Never found the Lord
My god as real
Now proven
He has blessed me with what I asked for
And now I feel guilty to ask if I can give it back
I deserve all that is to come
I deserve the pain I have to swollow
I deserve to have to count my tears
I deserve to lose my breathe
I deserve to not function as one should
All that he has given me as a lesson
I deserve it
I should be thankful
As I am for I have learned to not take things for granted
As I do still fall
And my mind still gets foggy
Deep inside there is one true feeling
That is grateful for all the days I\'ve lived
I deserve to have to be cautious to whom I love
To be cautious of relationships
Because the man I will love can make me cry
Can easily end my life
As I am fragile God has also made me strong
My fear is that no one will be there to get my inhaler When I can\'t reach it
As when it comes to my mental health
No one will be there to stop the thing that has taken over my body from doing a gravely mistake
I got everything I asked for
Now I know a God one I\'ll never hate
But fear in such a good loving way
He gave me all that I have asked for that was taken for granted
And gave me the gift of knowing him
Understanding him
He may not be my next door neighbor
But he is always above me
And I will forever reach
For I will forever deserve what was given until taken away
But I will never ask if I can give it back
For it is me who asked for it the very first time
He truly is a God and I truly got
Everything I wanted
Copyright ©2021 Tia Davis. All Rights Reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written consent of the author or publisher. All my poetry is copyrighted and stored in the author\'s base. All material subject to Copyright Infringement laws Section 512(c)(3) of the U.S. Copyright Act, 17 U.S.C. S512(c)(3), Tia Davis.