queer-with-a-pen

one last time

you made me feel

like i was hard to love

and that’s something i 

can’t find it in me

to forgive you for

 

after all, what good

am i to you

if there’s no sex?

 

seems like the answer

to that is a naive and

generous $400 and that

hoodie you stole from me

 

i told myself that if you

were happy, that was

enough for me,

for 5 fucking months

 

and what do i have to

show for it?

 

a last dinner together

that you were 40 minutes

late for, that i ate alone,

which is ironically the best

meal i’d ever had with you

 

and i think of you

years from now 

doing to another partner 

what you did to me

 

and in the midst of this

anger and hurt, i pity you

 

because, dearheart

when it comes to lasting love,

selflessness, reciprocity,

and symbiosis 

 

your cup doesn’t 

runneth over

 

it just runs out