melancholic philia

DISTANCES AWAY

 

Distances away I leave my heart
On a cold shiny platter
Where no feelings have ever emerged
Where no love has ever manifested
But only a shivering hate
That withers like raw cotton on a windy day
Only for that same hatred to return after bitter disappointment
When I have created sky high hopes
On wobbly stilts
And beared witness to all those hopes falling to the ground and crumbling down
But who am I to expect the world
When all I have ever gotten was the barren wasteful sediments of the the fruitful Earth

Distances away I leave my blood
The blood that has given me my identity
The blood that has given me life
But also has snatched my life away from me
The same blood that has bid me farewell
At the very moment that they welcomed me to the world
The same blood that has turned my soul into a dark cloud

Distances away I leave my hatred
My vile feelings of anger
The leash on the thunderous beating heart that screams inside me
Has now been released
And the butterflies that have been hiding behind the abhorrence have now taken flight