i am tired of drowning under the weight of the sky above me
i am tired of pretending to do backstrokes against the current of the tidal wave
the strength of the world is pulling me backwards in time
fighting is draining so much energy from my fragile body
i am tired of battle
i am tired of pushing and pushing and forcing things that are just simply not meant to be
i am tired of putting energy into people that do not care enough to put energy into me
i care way too much about everyone else
i struggle to take care of myself often
i am tired of excusing my horrid behavior
i am tired of having to justify myself and my actions because they were too immature
i am tired of breaking down and humiliating myself in front of the people i love the most
mature people know how to compose themselves in stressful situations
i, as a forming adult, have yet to earn this badge
i am so tired of lying
to myself and to others
tired of hurting
myself and others
of crying
for myself and for others
i am tired of having the responsibility of living with myself
the responsibility of dealing with my mind on a day to day basis, that’s tough work, not intended for the weak minded
i am tired of self-comfort
i am tired of pity parties
i am tired of me, in this tiresome world