A poor farmer and rich rancher had a very bitter dispute
Each claimed the same piece of land which the other did refute
This landed them before the judge, which sent them to arbitration
But neither wanted to budge, and preferred litigation
The farmer could think of nothing all day, and at night he couldn’t sleep
The rancher snarled “cost what it may, this land I intend to keep”
Spending all the money that he had, a cheap lawyer the farmer found
For my children, things are real bad, please help me keep this piece of ground
My children that are small are sick and we have no where else to go
The rancher doesn’t need the land and his horses trample what I grow
Although poor, if His Honor would in favor of me decide
I’d make him a present of a bore, cow, or horse that he could ride
My God! the lawyer said, you have no idea of what you’re saying
In jail you will make your bed if the judge you’re thinking of paying
This judge is a strict, religious man, of a family old and respected
Not a blemish in his honesty has ever been detected
A moralist of the highest degree such a thing would offend his pride
And as you can see, this would give sure victory to the other side.
Finally the day arrived for the verdict to be delivered
Looking the farmer in the eye, the judge’s voice never quivered
This land is yours he said and with this his lawyer scratched his head
Something’s strange in this verdict read, this case was too easily pled.
After picturing my child hungry and homeless without a shoe
The farmer said, I did just what I told you I was going to do
Said the lawyer I’ll bet my diploma that in this ointment there’s a fly,
This has a bad aroma, I was certain this judge you couldn’t buy
The farmer said I too am surprised, This I have to confess
I was afraid that in giving the gift I’d made a terrible mess
I went to town sending the judge my only horse that wasn’t lame
He watched the lawyer frown then said “I sent it in the rancher’s name