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Absence of your presence in my life woke sadness

An email written to eldest daughter

December 28th, 2019,
which unwittingly, magically, accidentally...

resurfaced while scrolling

thru outdated emails
and OpenOffice documents of mine
thee evening of February 20th, 2022.

 

The remaining lines

comprising reasonable poetic rhyme

sent to said offspring
more than two plus years ago
and dada feels grief no more, cuz time

heals all wounds.

 

Papa unexpectedly overtaken with woe

flashback shook me complex edifice
head, shoulder, knees in to toe

quietly processing silent film status quo

shant upended jollity
between when a little girl no

matter mine nonconformist
mien unconditionally accepted,

ye dear daughter(s) don\'t know

sudden onset of anguish ho... ho... ho

holiday cavorting accentuated as
charade, facade, masquerade fueling ego

particularly Santa with the Misses,
and her sharp faux claws
keeping warm while
temperature five below.

 

No matter most every detail
I accurately gauge to attest
your life bustling
chock full o\' zest

withheld, no doubt emotions
smolder within your chest

and kudos to thee lovely offspring
(both) packed bags
and headed out west

twas honorable duty, though now...
papa feels like
an unwanted guest

thee survived, albeit psyche bruised,

undergoing the electric
kool aid acid test

laughter when playing
Mancala, Uno, Sorry, et cetera,
how dada predictably did jest

when table turned,
I (spoiler Craigslist curb alert)

willingly, lovingly, and blithely
lost desire to win quest

to dispose cards, game
pieces, and/or glass beads

invariably other occasions
ye long since left (as thee must)
me and mother with an empty nest.

 

Nothing more doth
Matthew Scott ask or desire
then to delight and bask
as well educated hire

swimmingly how thee
learned to acquire

confidence and multitasking,
while I trod thru much
psychological muck mire

oft times (like now)
experiencing financial straits dire,

linkedin to when only youngster fire

within me belly to joie de vivre
peter out and prematurely expire

and yours truly reckons nothing
can change the past aghast being

deprived a marshmallow
at long ago time sharing campfire
with shortcomings scalding,
killing, crimping relationship,

courtesy lack of income

rendered paternal bond disastrously dire
doth now conclude another poetic wire.