is it normal to ache for you? the feeling of self-pity just because of an unfortunate event. the feeling of sadness when I see memories captured in photographs, smiles and laughter now coloured in black and blue. the hope of you returning back home is like a dream of me growing a pair of wings and flying away. the anger and hatred of grief sickening me like a plague. i hate you. i hate you. i hate you. but why? why do I hate you so much if I\'m in the wrong? I\'m being unfair and cruel, selfishness of my own feelings creating a particular type of prejudice that doesn\'t make sense. it all draws back to the simple feeling of loneliness and dependence on you. who will take care of me? will I have to talk to myself forever?
will you come back?
if I love you so, I must let you go. my own pain should not outweigh your happiness, and your freedom, and your love, and your kindness and most importantly your growth.
you have outgrown me. and I still shrivel in the sun, not accepting its warmth. and I refuse the water offering me nutrients. you accepted them all, and staying with me would just be holding you back from blooming.
so, I\'ll love you forever in my heart. even if at the time it didn\'t seem so.