Valerie

Death

I’m so incredibly scared of Death,

yet falling into old age seems unbearable

and I would at least like to look good in my casket.

If I surrender myself to you, Death,

will I fall gracefully?

The scythe I put to my own skin

beats the reaper

and saves him the trouble

of getting rid of another lifeless soul.

 

I’d haunt my mother

to apologize for taking away the gift of life that she gave me.

My memorial card would be an apology letter to anyone whose life I’ve crawled into on bruised and blistered knees.

 

At my funeral,

I do not want flowers

For if anyone wanted to give them to me,

they would’ve done it while I was alive.

I do not want a celebration of life.

I do not want anyone to mourn.

I just wish to be rid of this world

that has been so good to others.

 

I hope that I am greeted by the god

who has never answered to me.

So I could show him

the product of his neglect.