Butterflymoments

Just An Enemy

I hate how I feel
things that happen is so unreal

It went from a gentle warm touch
To being disappointed and a fuss. 

to raising insecurities
then turning around and feeling a fist

The damage a relationship could cause
Wishing God would erase it all

How can this be?
Does he know what he means to me?

Do you really feel I deserve this?
Become a victim to a narcissist

I could never explain how much the relationship brought me so much pain
In the end, still wanting to love him again 

Realizing everything that I was starting to hate

Was a man who was making the biggest mistake 

Hours, days, weeks, months, and years 
moments that were fill with tears

Feelings turned from what I once felt was love 
Until I wish I didn\'t know him at all

I was filling myself with hate
Wishing I would walk away

Drinking alcohol 
and doing drugs 

just to numb the pain
so, I couldn\'t feel nothing at all

Having relations
just to ease the frustrations.

Is he in control of my life? 
Or is my mind on a vacation?

I was losing myself 
Wishing I could find someone to just help

Isn\'t there a therapist 
That can help and despair a sis?

How many sessions would it take? 
just to make the pain erase.

Erase from my memories 
and realize he was just an enemy.