I miss the way you once were...
You will never be that again...
So please let me hang onto that...
I can\'t bear to see you...
I know you\'ve changed...
In that way, I\'ve always dreaded...
I can\'t, it will open it all up, and I\'ll become tragic again...
Our moments in time, which are seared on my heart...
Of us, in the snow, in the pool, on that field...
That I will allow to be part of what I am and what I\'ve lost...
When you loved me, you sent me home so I wouldn\'t be hurt, by the truth...
If that is still a little part of you...
Please leave where you are, and do not let me know you have left...
So, if I come, you\'ll be gone, and my pain will be the same...
For to see you and then see what you\'ve gone back to...
Will tell me, our love was a lie, and our moments of what we endured was for nothing...
I did it then, willingly, so you wouldn\'t be hurt any more...
I can never do all of it again, it will break me, and use up what integrity I have been able to get back...
In NYC, you asked me if it could be like this forever, that moment...
No...it can\'t...
Let me see you in the snow, laughing then crying, as you put my hand on your heart...
I was so proud of us...let me hang onto that pride, that like a vapor, came and went...
Much like your dignity...that you gave away so cheaply...
In my pictures of us, I\'d like to think you got it back...
I can\'t bear this; I can\'t bear you...please let me have what we were...
I\'ll be in heaven before you, and I will ask God to let us as be, as we were then...
So, look for me, with long hair, and you with yours so short...
When we saw the truth of who we both really are...tragic yet in love.