jark

flower / ant infestation

there’s an ant infestation in my home 
i wake up full of nightmares sometimes 
i wake up sweaty and cold 
i woke up today with a tickle on my wrist 
an ant climbing through the hairs on my arm up to my elbow 
i watched it 
i used to not want to kill the ants 
i still don’t 
so through curled lips i’ll blow a short breathe 
shooting the ant straight off my skin 
never to know where it lands, 
it’s somewhere in my room
that i lay poison down in the corners of 
dust and goop, plastic traps filled with powder 
i’m not the killer i just laid them down there 
for ants to eat and curl up and croak 
when i see an ant i don’t smush it, i blow 
i don’t know why 
i don’t want to watch it wilt 
i over water my flowers and it gets them killed 
i don’t know why i won’t let them grow 
i can’t fulfill a future full such unknowns