Paul Bell

Getting It Off.

Can I ask you something?

Yeah, sure.

Would you say I’m the tear the clothes off sort of woman.

What sort of clothes are we talking about.

Any clothes.

Does that include that leather jumpsuit.

Apart from the leather jumpsuit, though every other guys managed to get it off.

Maybe they had the instructions.

Or maybe they were just more experienced. 

I would be more experienced if I didn’t have to phone your office to book you in for sex.

Is that why Sally was laughing at me.

Was Sally the girl who took my message.

Yes, do you know the embarrassment that caused me.

Sally says she’s got a leather jumpsuit, and she’ll show me how to get it off quick.

Yeah, I just bet she did, they don’t call her SS for nothing.

Are her parents German.

No dummy, she’s a slapper.

That’s not nice, I’m going to her house tonight to practice getting the jumpsuit off quick.

Have you lost your mind, one look at Sally in her underwear, and you’ll be frothing at the mouth.

She’ll not be wearing underwear, seemingly this is how  you get it off quick. Sally says after five attempts, I’ll be an expert.

Let me put this to you in a simple language you’ll understand. You go near Sally and I will chop something off you.

Oh, I’m sensing insecurity here. Sally said this would happen.

Right, I’m going into the bedroom, and I’m going to get naked, then I’m going to put the bloody leather jumpsuit on, then you’re going to take it off five times, then we’re going to have sex all over the house.

Better not tell her, Sally said this would happen.