Where the hell is it
I’m sure I put it there
Right beside where I sit
In the old armchair
I know I had it not long ago
Are you sure you’ve not put it away
Just check it’s not under that throw
That’s where it was yesterday
I know I used it last
No need to raise your voice
Or rake up the past
And for your information
Yes I’ve been working late
But it’s that renumeration
That pays for this fancy estate
Will you stop whining
And come and help me look
Instead of just opining
About the time I took
Oh damn it all I’ve had enough
Stuff your casserole
Get over here and shift your stuff
And find that remote control!