Grandma\'s Mispronunciations
Grandma makes us laugh at all the things she says
She dreams of going to “Erotic” places on her holidays.,
A life of idle luxury is one of Grandma’s dreams.
Travelling in the back of a “Sofa” driven limousine.
The family exchanged stories of Gran’s mispronunciations
Her verbal faux pas and funny annunciations.
When Grandma wins the lottery she’ll spend some of her stack
On a lovely “ Bunk a low “ in a quiet “ Cozy sack!”
She’ll open up a Zoo of species under threat
Reintroduce the “ Dojo” the Tiger and Marmoset.
Of all endangered creatures we really can’t forget
The “ Articulated” Python would be her chosen pet.
Our Granny sold her furniture in the local weekly news.
She hoped to make some changes to replace the old with new.
Her continental sofa attracted some alarm.
A “Cheese lounge “ piece of furniture.
A couch with just one arm.
She dreams of moving house when she gets filthy rich.
She \'d have her new pad built from scratch choose a massive pitch.
Forget about her neighbours, leave them all behind.
Order up a Mansion that’s “ Artichoke “ designed.
So if you want a giggle or if you’re feeling flat.
Pop around to Grandma’s house for a cuppa and a chat.
She’ll tell you tales and stories of how it used to be
Long before the “ Tintterwebs,”“ Shell “ phones and “ Stalagmite” TV.