Another great year, lucky to have lived Recapping every moment
as far as I can recall
and down I wrote the moonstruck tale
Calling to mind the greatest and least moments lived.
when I was dreamy and in love
and the blissful memories made
January of new beginnings
Realized that I needed to be kinder to myself wanted the woo me kind of love
the kind of hot pursuit that causes shivers down your spine
I somewhat hungered for it
but feared that genuine affection being not a thing of these days.
loyalty , love and respect a thing of the past
To master to not fall too hard or not fall at all.
a trait I needed to acquire
And to choose self above all else
February had me cleaning up messes,
A mess that had become of my life,
Regain at-least some dignity lost,
chasing a love that wasn’t mine
Needing to pity me
Since losing everything beneath and behind
My worth and peace of mind
I had feelings to unpack a debt an owed myself Unload the phantoms from memory and grasp reality
To not live in fantasies
Later did I feel much peace.
March full of woes
without shame taught me a lesson to never forget
Without shame I was captivated
by wacky words that had me swooning
Honeyed words said with such eloquence that had me in a haze
The captivating smiles that had me drifting around in a daze
I dived in headfirst.
The outcome being either pleasure or pain
I later found myself alone
A route took to forget an old flame
assuming that there is plenty of fish in the sea Having the right bet
hoping to catch a Molly quite shocked
it was moray eel instead
April promised growth
to bounce back and be girl I used to be
hopeful and resilient
Wanting to bloom and flourish
forget the pain but forge strength from the pain and finally live my life right
like the dandelion , learn to thrive despite circumstances
May had me setting sails
I was at sea very far from land
No one could tell that I was sinking
I shut down
Held on to things I thought I needed to stay afloat
they only sank me further
stricken with horror
I shut down
ran away from the life I knew
took time off
to reflect and review
i made a choice then
to surround myself with what will only hold me steady
June was paradise earth
Met a captain, he was my captain
Destination la la land
A thrilling experience is what June promised
We talked for hours
Could barely let the phone out of sight.
Mocked myself for being a goner
He was death to me
An imperfect perfect match
Tried to Cement relations bound to last
The distance didn’t bare any effect
I turned , kicked and grinned days on end
Came close to packing a bag and running to him
i knew better to never not all rob myself a chance to pursue that which made me smile
The july of surprises wiped the tears I shed for far too long,
I am so glad I chose to be headstrong
the stars were finally smiling at me
buoyancy a trait that summed up the caliber of one who unfortunately was met with circumstances that stripped off her delicate nature
due to fate that lay a burden far too great
August was just august
What I had desired and yearned for months on end finally in my sight
feet intertwined and everything in between
our lips touching and kisses energizing me to no end
When face to face I had a chance to satisfy my appetite
Looked at me like he was staring right into my soul
exuded an aura that completely captivated me
his presence giving a sense of euphoria
I had a good laugh
I had a good time
he had the touch of a wizard
his kisses flowing like magic potions
Like the magic of the elixir in effect
i couldn’t help but fall in love
he had me in a trance that I was mesmerized
like a ghost in the wind I disappeared
And I put my feelings to sleep
september had me looking forward to extra hours to spend with her
Since the time spent in her company purely bright
straight from the heart
I wish to confess
A fact most true
She is a million times worth of my love Every second spent loving and thinking of her worth the effort
it is how she makes every moment worthwhile
Not merely a friend but a piece of heaven
Since I have been star struck since day one
looking back, I could only admire how far we’ve come
My fated soul mate, and I could only hope that we could go on
I have no intentions to ever leave your side
All I know is that you are half of my Soul
A part of me I will forever carry with me
You being the greatest love I have ever had
October was October
I turned a year older
A time when the love showered is so fake
since most are never around for my sake
when needed, they can barely text
Leaving me to my own worries causing so much strain and aches
But I will forever hold on to the memories made
it is up to me to take on the world and be brave
November bore shocks I was never expecting
after atleast having a touch of reality
since closing a chapter so painful
i was foolish and delicate then
i couldn’t be swayed now since I knowing my worth
a Fool is what I chose to not be.
when the one who hurt me most
Said needed me close
his audacity demanded that I sever ties he thought were left
it did me good to take another look
and forget the love I had which he forsook
lonesome December
felt like I was missing something
surrounded but I still felt alone
i thought I was tough
Behind the smiles was a different emotion
Since i was crumbling inside
the question of whether I lived a good year lingering at the back of my mind
in all honesty it was good
some days just felt a bit too much
I lived the best and worst days
But I know the best is soon yet to come
Hoping to live yet another great year
to write again in 365 days