What is the cost emotionally
a conscious question never asked
A place of puzzlement my face feels flush again with intensity of furrowed brow
It only comes by completing tasks
while feelings surfaced unsurpassed
Tugging at the very core of me
just who do I really think I can be now
Courage that it takes in moving forward gnaws at feelings deeply stored
How it feels a certain way when whispered screams are held at bay
When the outcome is unknown for now attempting to dissuade somehow
A sometimes fleeting emptiness surprises
does it hate when certain joy arises
The parts of me kept safe til now where that vulnerability tends to hide and how
What is this annoying thing that tugs at me while facing what\'s unknown in me
Rebellion fights unconscious patterns threatening sheltered growth
When the soul cries out for more
beyond whats ever known before
The way they stay ignored answers patiently await what\'s unexplored
Where the answers lie my mind may find
in time only in the places ive arrived
Sometimes in the stress of making plans
it still will strike me how
Even when discomfort comes somehow
i still believe its meant to be this way now