…….Kirk to enterprise, Kirk to enterprise, drop the ladder for a brotha, cause I’ll be damn if I take a ride on the transporter, standing there with my brow raised, looking fearfully amazed, I be damn if I take a ride on the transporter, what if it malfunctions in midway, my molecules could be turned to jewels, that sounds kool but I had mo’ better blues, I rather have new shoes; I don’t think I’d come out kool, and it might be a little more than just my shoes are too tight, or a change in height, I mean my chin bone might be connected to my scrotum, I told ‘em, in my Gil Scott-Heron voice, I be damn if I take a ride on the transporter, I assure you I’ll floor you, if you beam me up with that damn contraption, I’ll surprise you, and come out scraping, Scotty gonna get some fractures. Phasers better be set on stun, or bullets in a old fashion gun, cause I’ma be Attila the Hun, it won’t be fun. Now drop that ladder, I’ll climb three hundred and thirty thousand feet, in the heat, fall and hit the street before I’m transported, I can’t afford it, y’all brought it, and will be escorted off the ship, if a single hair off my head is transported; y’all must have snorted, but don’t get merked out, Kirk out!