sophin

Peanut Butter

I’ve got a girl back in my pyrite days

who could tell the brand of peanut butter

by the taste from my p-b-and-j sandwiches

she lives back up the street in Memory Lane

we don’t talk anymore since i had to move away

 

and the old ghosts of the souls

that i used to know still haunt me

it was sunshine coming through 

glass window panes, bright but distorted

we were bright but distorted

i think i was blinded by your light

like you were blinded by mine

we don’t talk anymore

 

we were counting stars in the daytime

when we were supposed to be working

except my girl and i need no sun or nothing

we were on ground and none of that sky stuff mattered

our wings hung down in the lazy afternoon

we had wings but we never needed to use them

until they dragged us up by the feathers and hoisted us into the clouds

and i was flapping desperately only i knew nothing about flying

and you were falling through the expanse of blue because you

knew nothing about flying

 

i got my bearings straight though it took some time

set my eyes on the horizon and then i could look back

but by the time i looked back i couldn’t find you

and if you fell i didn’t know

and if you screamed i didn’t hear

we are separated by five years of aging

when did we drift so far apart when did we

 

you know they still whisper legends about the pair of birds

locked together at the ankles until they became each other’s shackles

and when one bird flew up the other bird fell

and that was just how it was

my girl and i don’t need no stars

but i had the stars shoved down my throat

and you burned yourself before the stars could get you

was it worth it girl was it worth it

 

it had to be worth it because i started pouring the artificial ideals down my throat like reverence

it had to be worth it because you starting pouring whisky down your throat like revenge

and i think them stars start to taste sweet after a while if you keep telling yourself that

and i don’t drink no whisky, we swore when we were young never to

you broke that promise but i left you first in the sky so it all balances out

did you scrape open your beautiful lungs to settle a score girl did you

does the damn alcohol taste good on your tongue don’t you know it’s killing you

i see it through the halfhearted texts my girl is a shell of who she used to be

and i’m telling you to stop when it isn’t my place only it is

and you’re telling me to back off like it isn’t my place only it isn’t

i watched you snap your angel wings and let them drag bloody on the ground

as if they were some sort of trophy for going against the status quo

don’t you see you are bleeding out it’s red red red don’t you see

 

i told a lie to you the other day but you didn’t know it but you used to

and you were telling me you could tell the different brands of beer by the texture on the tongue

and i was praying that you were lying because this is not who we are

my broken shackle hangs from my left ankle like a lead weight, chipped by time

but yours still digs into your right, you kept it in yourself and wouldn’t let it heal

the people on the streets stare at the uneven footprints stained with grief

you glare at them because it is the only thing you can do but it isn’t

and if i could lend you my wings could we both fly together again

this time i know how to fly so it is different

but you are once bitten twice shy and hate the clouds

hate the fake glamor that drapes over me

hate that you don’t know how to love anymore

but if you would only take my hand it will be alright because i always figure something out

you are once bitten twice shy but you don’t have to be

only we are separated by five years of aging and the gap would shred the life i’ve built

and if i let it crumble for the remnants of the other half of my soul it would all have been worth nothing it would’ve all been worth nothing the stars the whisky then why did we have to hurt

so i said none of that because i left you first so i owe you a score

but i bet all the beer in the world wouldn’t taste as good as peanut butter sunshine

it was coming through the window panes, distorted and bright

 

we don’t talk anymore since i left town.