I stand suspended
A crossroads
Nowhere to turn
Nowhere to go
I know I must move
But I wish not to
For one step forward
Is a step without you
The way backward
Has been barricaded
By my own mind
I can no longer be
With or
Have you
Yet I still long for your gaze
The impression of your hand
Against mine
My one
My only
Love
I feel as a petulant child
Denied their favorite toy
Yet I contain the wisdom
That reasons my emotions
I am okay
Am okay
Okay?
I shall say it
To my bleeding
Gaping hole
Where my heart should be
For you have torn it out
Time and time
On repeat
Ignorance is what you feign
You are too innocent in my eyes
To fully comprehend what you are doing
How can you behold such intelligence?
Yet be so dull?
So oblivious?
My heart has been yours for so long
You ignore it
It is not enough for you
I understand not
Still you pull me in with words
Smiles
Inside jokes
How dare you do such a thing to me
You love me
Not
I love you
Always
Shattered pieces of my heart
At least one will always belong in your hands
Your eyes
I pick them up
Carry them with me
Till they can begin to fuse together
Right before I can place it back inside
You steal it again
Over and over
Let me keep my sanity
My heart
This tendril of red
Fills me up
Makes me smile
Makes sunshine explode in my chest
At the same time
Contains such sharp barbs
That blood runs like a river
From my heart
Icy water flows from my eyes
They remain dry
I have cried into a desert
Such anger curdles my veins
I can not allow this no longer
Logic is not a player in this game
I wish it were
Perhaps then I could understand
A way to rid myself of you
The fire in my soul
I wish it would scorch
Obliterate
Until nothing of you remains
For I know I can never hold your heart
The walls you have built
Are so great
I have tried to knock
Ask to be let in
Denied
Time and time
On repeat
Oh what a fool I am
To fall not once
Not twice
But over and over
For a soul
Who cannot see the beauty in mine
The courage it had taken to overcome my fear for you
What a tragedy this is
To have fallen in love
But not be enough
For your \"other half\"
Is love really a thing?
Or just a trick of the mind?
I want to know
For maybe I can trick mine
Into no longer
Yearning
Desiring
Loving
One such as you