V1
To end some of my heartache,
I have a story to tell,
a memory of a fine maiden,
the Queen of Beacon Hill,
who dished out her service,
to both pure, and those who hurt,
as she was both firm and fair,
was good old Sweaty Gert!
Chorus (x2 at the end)
Oh, Sweaty Gert, Sweaty Gert!
you are on my mind,
please do take me back
to a time, that was more kind!
V2
She slapped the wrists of scamps,
whose pockets boasted sweets,
scolded were the tradesmen,
who were tardy with their sweeps,
a delight she was, when all was right,
when not, she would be curt,
best not disturb the peace,
of good old Sweaty Gert!
V3
If she was still around,
clarity would be a thing,
for she would not tolerate,
stuff that belongs in bin,
such as morally bankrupt leaders,
and stars that dwell in dirt,
I think her ghost’s behind you,
yeah! It’s Sweaty Gert!
V4
Ma and I did meet her,
both generations did heed
that this lady of fire and ice,
was formidable indeed,
she shook our hands tightly,
as her toil ran down her shirt,
I hope this song does find you well,
Good Old Sweaty Gert!