There are moments when I think it’s fine
When I feel calm
When I don’t think
When I can hardly believe pain exists
That pain is your reality
It’s what brings you to the truth
No matter how deep or shallow
The braises, bruises, scars, and burns
Reality is pain
It’s suffering
But its also the moments where you forget
Forget pain and joy
Moments when you’re just not thinking
When your in fact thinking so hard
That your not thinking at all
One subject, but no emotion.
That’s the feeling I get from you
It’s not butterflies
It’s not tears
It’s just there.
A blank page of paper
No discouraging lethal imagery
Yet no delightful scenery
Just there.
I glance at your smile
Wondering why it’s composed
Not caring about the joy it conveys
Simply the beauty it bestows
A world where I feel nothing
A world where I feel everything
When I’m with you
It’s just there.