My life started off with no pg sticker and I soon felt the harshness of reality but also the loving, forgiveness part too!
Once becoming a Father I got another wake up call to the rules boundaries and limitations that comes in life.
With those three things in mind I\'ve been on a never-ending challenging journey to handle confrontation with calmness and most importantly see my own self worth in this world.
Dogs and us share such a deep interwoven connection in the way we raise our young and mostly importantly run and use our own social skills.
Even at this very moment as I sit in my garden, trying to write this. listening to the neighbours, now tipsy barbecue party, with banter going on that is obviously getting close to the line! Boundaries and limitations I hope nobody will cross, if only there were clearer rules like we do with a sport to function as a constructive outlet!
At the very beginning dogs teach their young the boundaries ( like no play fighting while at the milking station)
Next big one would be when it\'s time to cut them off completely from their dependency on it, giving limits and rules that are not crossed.
In day to day life we live within a structure where the rules are backwards for many dogs. Some can handle it but most are a trigger waiting to happen and many humans will still look at the breeds, rather than understand the complexity of conditioning behind it.
Even in most cases when Unwanted behaviour transpires with good or bad intentions, as it does with our own children. The root causes is often overlooked or misunderstood.
The only thing that makes \"Us\" the so called \"dominant\" ones is that we are bigger than the infants, once the age is reached to feel they can challenge authority they do!
How that authority is given and received, plus the whole journey in life will bring the exceptions of how to handle the variety of situations that they go through.
Teaching the trust and respect that bring the loyalty is the most full on mentally changing thing you can do, with dogs or our children.
Learning constantly with how to keep our self and the pack in a neutral state of mind, this means not in flight, fight or freeze. Surrendering becomes the only thing left, bring a mind that\'s able to absorb information better and react with little to no intensity bring only curiosity.
Often I catch myself acting out of emotion rather than necessity, this is where a dogs reaction will differ depending on my energy. Knowing this and learning to breathe in moments of built-up tension always changes everyones actions. Giving space to find the next move or conclude that maybe none is needed at all!
The path to think dog, is a beautiful world of seeing how truly powerful we are and the unbelievable affects we have within the world around us. In the simplicity of body language and the energy we use every second of every day.
Dog by dog I\'ve been slowly shown the path of less resistance. As humans we can study, listen to lectures and watch videos to help guide us in what could be an appropriate response or action in a particular set of circumstances . Nature on the other hand works more by trial and error basis, then some monkey see monkey do kind of observation to act.
Going through many schools of thought from trainers and psychologist, both human and animal it soon became time for me to get a puppy of my own. A brindle boxer mix Staffordshire bull terrier, with all the energy of a rocket ready to go. I quickly learned that dogs with a lot of intensity bite hard and it hurts, that become my first obstacle to over come! Lose the fear of getting a bite and help to redirect it on to something that could be bitten.
This would soon pass and my confidence grow, now armed with so much knowledge and the ability to walk my then 6 month old dog with no tension on the lead, it was like nothing could stop me.
Little did I know that my next lesson would come from a random stranger and their dog. As she strolled around a little lake I could see the struggle as there was two leads attached and still pulling her along with a bouncing arm just managing to hold on.
With my cocky attitude and this new found passion, I caught up and started chatting everything I could about dogs and my journey. She soon told me that the dog had actually bitten someone for the last time and was on its last walk!
I couldn\'t believe it. As if the universe could hear my thoughts and just handed me what I\'d been asking for.
As we walked some more sharing stories and she was letting her tears go. I asked if I could interact with the dog, as she cleared her throat and said yes I got some treats out of my pocket.
It gave me a few sniffs and took the biscuit, chuffed I thought this is going well. Suddenly as I look at the dog grabing another treat from my pocket it full on lunged at me! Luckily I pulled my arm up and jumped back to just get a slight tooth mark.
After many apologies I tried to explain that it was 100% my fault. Yet she could only think of what she\'d been told and that the dog was the problem. Sadly this happens all the time.
Knowing straight away I had to replay the moment again and again in my head until i could see what I did wrong with my own body language. It soon became clear of the energy of the owner, walking around in a very unsure and nervous manner that would of made the dog feel more on edge in extra protection mode. Then here I come along with a false sense of confidence and trigger the dog into thinking I was the threat they was looking out for.
Now with my ego put in check I was ready to continue my journey into the world of dogs. By 9 months old my own dog was becoming a fantastic show of my ability to do the job I set out to do. Again I was not ready for the next lesson of an none united pack would bring and upset the balance of a dog.
I\'d already made many difficult choices in life but choosing to except that when you have two children under 5 and only one out of two adults confidently able to control an animal. It is best for all involved that an environment that suits the dog is put first and as I was still part time in another job i rehoused my dog. ( Who lived out her days into a wonderful old age)
Many years passed with me advertised as a walker of aggressive dogs and a few steady clients, before long I was offered the opportunity for rehabilitation that was need with a Chihuahua mix Jack Russell. With lots of discussions we made the choice to help, within weeks he fitted right in and was doing fantastically well.
Again as time passed the dog improved but the ripples of not coming to agreements in the house rules and boundaries, lead to a divorce with an amicable separation.
As this transpired I had gone into full time dog training and concentrating more on the psychology side to learn just how to create a calm balanced dog.
I was always clear and upfront with everyone on only having 5 years experience and over a year of that was just in the theory side. One evening I got a call from someone about their dog and they were in a right panic with the information they\'d be give by one of the biggest UK dog rescue centres on a young saffie they had rehoused from them and could I help in any way? I told her I could help but she needed to hang up the phone, take a few minutes and call be back. She did and in a lot calmer voice explaining in detail the problem and information they\'d given her about this dogs temperament but it didn\'t add up to what they was seeing, I offered to just meet up for an assessment and this wonderful person would soon make me feel a lot better than I could of ever made them!