domilla

The mountain between us

I stood down below and pondered
my eyes looking up the hills
Thinking if I will be able to say what is in my heart 
For fear of not knowing  how to say it all  
It’s not a fine line I want to let out 
It’s an apology for being a nuisance and a vote of thanks

But why must he frighten me so
even when the need to speak is indeed great 
When I breath in deep enough I feel it 
The words stuck in my throat, they are choking May there never be any words left unsaid 
Since Tomorrow has never been my friend  
His kind assurance that he will forever  be there, i still believe
Though some days I would doubt 
His efforts I did ignore 
Meanwhile Behind the scenes he would work tirelessly
Trying to make things right

he had a dream  that we could have it all
even when he may not have it all  
to be able to give the whole lot that was needed  
I should have pondered on it more 
Judging was easy  
it’s how he delivered in the end that changed my tune  
It was necessary that I change my notions 
Begin to accept the unseen acts of love 
I was at sea beside myself with grief  
Of the shameless doubts I harbored in mind 
My eyes now fit to see the hidden scenes
i grew up,  the world didn’t look the same 

The single difference, made me appreciate what I had looked down on 
I cried to the moon and it didn’t answer 
Wanting him to have a breakthrough  
Some days his efforts would cut no ice 
This time I did understand  
I turned to heaven on most days to ask for a miracle  
to bring forward rain in that  season that was dry 
and to bless all the work of his hands 
The lord did grant that miracle 
My life changed, though bit by bit 
And For a moment when  I stop and look back at  how far we’ve come  
I can only admire his grit that kept him grounded Since fortune only favors the brave
his effort was the greatest gift

To have all the Words moving in my head but still locked up inside, is a shame  
I can only breath right when I do my part
Before it is too late 
We live apart, feels like there’s a mountain in between  
I have not seen his face, nor heard his voice in a while 
Some disagreement that later happened  
Feels now like the discomfort of the winter cold Now Hoping for the advent season
I want to speak before it’s too late   
maybe Start with , “I love you papa”
I just live with the dream of someday climbing that mountain between us