In my ups and downs
It comes
Confined in my place of solitude
I’m a prisoner in myself
Seeking salvation every single time
I see they want to see it
And de-capitalize me for pleasure\'s sake
They call it addiction
I call it a terrorist.
A terrorist without a weapon.
It comes knocking like an ordered Uber
Dressed in a camo tank outfits
With candies and lollipop for me
If I try to hide, where will that be?
From the sound of my alarm
To the clap of my padlock in the evening
It hunts me, takes control of my mind
Renders my day in jeopardy.
In my sovereign mindscape
I’m a victim running away from
temptations
It comes like a fine darling
One turn around and it’s an old lady in rotten clothes
It feeds on my attention and focus
Devours my moral upright and condemns me to regret and guilt.
Far from the truth,
It’s an everyday battle
Not all attacks lead to success
Many have fallen including me
The sophisticated structure of desire
Mounted on the very volatile lobe of my soul.
Potentially it is the desire of our flesh
From the roots of Adam
We suffer for generations
And surfices to make judgements
Such abnormality!
I’m ripped off of my moral sanity
Plagued with biddings for the Devil
Concentrated in me is the hazardous habits
That leads me to fatality to meet Hades
Dionysus rendered my heart unresponsive
For I am a convict of self-murder.
Folks might say talk about it,
Perhaps talking about it
Would offend both God and the Devil
I would become an enemy of God and an advocate for the Devil
Cause no one will see it as I do
Janet kicks back at me for keeping mute
But in the meantime, it’s the best thing for me.
The gamble I played with life
Is still eating me up
But you don\'t see it
For the cause of living have I
Layed this on myself
And an unfortunate ruin
Have I blessed myself with.
Have I betrothed sleepless nights
Or did my nights just become longer
This is a real-life story
That not everyone comes clean to say
It\'s my wish that I would outlive this fate
And be a better option for my peers
Knowledge is good but
Experience is the still the best.