she_was_torture

float away

I write, and the words are true 

But i can’t feel 

I can see

But i can’t talk

Its back 

The block 

The leash 

The cage 

It keeps me prisoner 

It laughs 

Amused by my torment 

When i want to glare 

All i can do is laugh back 

It is funny if you really think about it 

A girl with no real problems 

Has trouble with her feelings 

Feelings about what? 

What does she have to be sad about? 

What could possibly be bad enough that her mind silences her at every turn? 

That when it is her turn to talk the words are right there 

But so far away?

Held back

On the tip of her tongue

Its a silly thing really 

Just speak 

Its not that hard 

Any other time you can’t stop 

The words fall out, no barrier at all 

Oh wait 

That’s not me 

Maybe once 

When i didn’t know any better 

When I didn’t know anything 

Was it better? 

When I was a child?

When i spout words like I’d run out? 

…that’s exactly what I did 

Or, at least, 

Thats what it feels like 

When i go to talk 

Its like ive simply run out of words 

Like everything i’ve every learned has left my brain

Just floated away

Like a dandelion fluff in a summer breeze 

But where did they go? 

How could they simply just disappear? 

And why can’t I?