if i can’t turn my body off,
i’ll just wear it out
until my battery is gone.
if i can’t make myself forget,
i’ll never sleep, never
let you out of my sight.
in the warm sunshine,
your eyes examine mine,
looking for evidence.
no need for that —
my heart is glowing,
sweetly ruined, empty and yours.
it is as black as tar,
almost impossible to bright up,
cold like it’s a barrel of a gun.
but then.. it’s you.
it’s your hands that i’m holding,
agonizingly afraid to lose.
your cheeks flame up,
a color of powder pink.
and i inhale its flowery smell
and everything that used to be divine
goes pale in my eyes.
only your colors. only you shades
make my veins boil,
itchy from inside, they grow
as your seeds grow inside me, too.
rose skin makes something shift,
my body’s being remolded
into a soft cloud shape,
ready to enter flushed paradise.
if i can’t be with you —
i won’t be here at all.
how many days are left?
the room is quiet and dusty;
stuffy because one couldn’t find the door.
these reddened flames all over,
my black embraces pink,
the sunlight’s playing with your face.
don’t let it fade.
don’t close your eyes.
don’t go.