Help!
Help me, help me
Please
Help me!
Words uttered in the recesses of my mind
Sometimes I scream so loudly
I wonder
Can’t you hear me?
Don’t you see that I’m drowning?
Hanging on by a mere thread
That is about to break?
Then, I remember
No words have been uttered from my lips
I feel like I’m drowning
Falling
Free falling into an endless abyss
Where my concept of reality and fantasy has now become one
Who can I turn to?
Who can I talk to?
Hello!
Is anyone listening?
Help!
Please help me
How do I escape the constant battle in my own mind?
I beg you
Tell me how to get a vacation from my mind
Please
I need a break
I don’t know what to do
For someone who always has words
I am now at a loss
Baffled
There are no words to describe my feelings now
Have the words left me?
Help
Please help me
Why?
Why do people have to be the way they are at times?
Why do people knowingly hurt each other?
When will someone be the bigger person and say
Enough is enough!
No more!
Why is it so easy to utter words of hurt?
Does it make you feel better knowing that you’ve inflicted a deep wound
That might possibly take time to heal?
Why did you do it in the first place?
When?
When will hurting me be enough for you?
At what point will you stop?
When I am no more?
When I walk out the door?
I gave you everything
There\'s literally nothing left in me to give
When does the pain stop?
When will I be able to breathe again
Now that you have taken my air?
I hurt
I hurt so badly that I have become numb to everything and everyone
Is that what you wanted?
To reduce me to an unknown version of myself?
Someone whom no one will recognize?
Was this your intention all along
To bring me to the lowest point?
Then crush me with your feet
While I\'m on the ground?
Bleeding
Crying
Begging you
Stop!
Stop!
Please stop!
But
Instead
You laugh
Finally
I get it
You were never for me
You just pretended to be with me
To know my vulnerabilities
Yo know where to hit me for it to hurt the most
How?
How could I have been so wrong?
So foolish?
To trust you
To think that you were my biggest cheerleader, my confidante
My ride or die
My friend, my all
Guess you played me for a fool, huh?
Oh the pain!
It hurts
Its hurts so bad
This anguish
This gloomy feeling
This darkness that has overtaken me
The sun shines brightly outside
But
My insides are being twisted by an endless tornado
Turning
Churning
Breaking apart
Ripping my heart to pieces
Broken debris scattered
Never to be mended
I am tired
Tired of fighting
Tired of being hurt
Tired of holding it together when all I want to do
Is just fall apart
But
I’m not allowed
Be strong
They say
Hang in there
They say
It will get better
They say
How?
I say
How do I remain strong when the very ground I’m standing on
Is breaking
Shattering to pieces?
When?
I say
When will things get better?
After I am no more?
After my mind has lost the willpower to hold on to sanity?
I am literally hanging on by a thread
And here you come
Cutting the last piece that was holding me together
I tried
I tried so hard
To please you
To be what you wanted
But
It was never enough
You always wanted more
And I chose to ignore
The fact that
I was not the broken one
But
It was you
I didn’t need fixing
But you rearranged my personality
To suit yours
I was so naive
But
No more