Bettering !
Netflix has endless possibilities
Along with gas and water it’s one of our utilities.
Fancy cars are key to family life
A range rover for Dad and a” Beemer” for the wife.
An open diner- kitchen for our family meals.
An update on the transfer rates on credit card deals.
Labels on the alcohol we drink.
Without designer clothing what will the neighbours think ?
CCTV Cameras, all around our homes
In case a burglar calls when the kids are home alone.
Coz Mum and Dad work all the hours God sends
Providing for the children, impressing all their friends.
The trinkets and the chattels that they own,
Spread like silver trophies all around their home.
We must become red wine aficionados.
No place for beans on toast, instead an avocado.
We must go skiing in the spring in St Moritz.
I’ll buy the wife a boob job, realign her ………shoulders !
And we’ll go glamping when the summer comes.
And talk about extravagance with all the other Mums.
“We\'re going to hire a Limo for the prom!”
We’ll tell the kids about the humble backgrounds we came from
We’ll throw a birthday party for the ”Chavvy.
Show off our new bathroom with its “ Soft close “ seat on’t “ Lavvy.”
And we’ll become the gossip of the street..
The splendour of our home and our silent “Lavvy seat.”
Spring loaded, and engineered hydraulics.
And how my bamboo underwear stops chafing round mi ………waistband !
We have to show the locals that we’re affluent, you see.
We’ve triple glazed our windows, and bought a “ Glass” TV.
We make sure that our neighbours don’t forget.
That we’ve got lots of ready cash but we’re head and heels in debt.
And when there is a bill we need to pay.
We heap it on the mortgage for another day.
We spend our time and money chasing more.
Until the debt collector comes knocking at the door.