the father apologizes
in this story, but you’ve
already torn out the last
few chapters, so you
don’t know why,
or what for
maybe he’ll hug you,
this time, or run a hand
through your hair,
maybe make you breakfast?
or just call you his boy
and wouldn’t that be nice,
to be your father’s boy,
for the very first
fucking time?
and i’ll bite the
hand that held me,
alright, and i’ll
bite the hand that
beat me even harder
it’ll be his blood
on my teeth this time,
instead of mine
i’ll hold the knife
he gave me in a steady
grip, and excise every
last bit of the hurt
he left behind
and the father apologizes
in this story, but it
doesn’t fix anything
and the fear of a child
still haunts the man
that i grew up to be