I am from mountains and valleys
Rivers and oceans
I am from veins thick with the blood
That keeps us alive
I am from the hearts deep in our chests
The ones that care too much
The ones that don’t care enough
I am from the sounds of airplanes at night
The roaring of many miles up
Keeping my imagination awake
While I try to sleep
I was from all those days and nights
Spent with you
I was from the cozy evenings
Watching movies with you
I was from the flame of your passion
Of your drive
I was from watching you draw
You were always such a good artist.
I was from the texts I sent you
Wondering if you were okay in the mildest of sickness.
And now I am from those empty thoughts at night
Wondering if you still care.
I am from those days I see you at school
Laughing along with those other girls.
I am from wondering if you still know I exist.
From laughing and cheering
To depression and isolation.
I am from wondering if you know what this has done to me.
I am from those nights
Sitting alone in my room
Trying to forget about you
I am from crying myself to sleep
Regretting everything
I am from the anger I felt towards you
After I got over the sadness
I am from the sadness I still feel now.
I am from the temporary happiness
That comes after anger.
I am from the times I felt I could laugh and never stop
I am from the nights when it only took five minutes to fall asleep
I am from the nights after, when it took thirty.
I am from the nights after that, taking hours to fall asleep.
I am from the nights
Where I didn’t sleep at all.
I am from the nights
Where all I thought about
Was you
I am from waiting and watching
Wondering and listening
I am from wanting to come back
And from hating your guts
I am from feeling like I do not belong
I am from feeling like you didn\'t care
I am from wondering if this pressure I feel in my chest
Is normal
I am from knowing it isn\'t
But I am from everything else too
The world isn\'t just you
To me it was
To me it still kind of is
I am from knowing I have access to help
I am from refusing that same help
I am from finding family among new friends
I am from being depressed.
I am from you
And your love
I am from the emptiness you left
I am from knowing it was me
Who left you