Tune: Branle de l\'officiel
(\'Ding, dong, merrily on high\')
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Fido, Orchi, plan a song
They will sing it all day long
Though it\'s torture to you all
The singing will you appal
Chorus
Wo--oo--oo--ofs to you! Don\'t forget the eighteen plus [tick box]
Wo--oo--oo--ofs to you! Or Fido will cause great fuss
He will bark and howl and whine
If he sees any \'hot\' lines
For if you forget to tick
That [18+] box, he will bark, not lick - Chorus
But he wishes you all well
When he content, you can tall
Reading poems by fireside
His contentment not denied - Chorus
He can cause a right ding-dong
You\'ll not hear the end day-long
His bark be worse than his bite
Humour him, he won\'t you fright - Chorus