13LaurenD

No Longer Blaming Myself

Last night was the last time that I will allow myself to feel this way,

Because you are no longer going to control my thoughts everyday.

I have finally realized that I can do so much better than you,

And it will be someone who won’t put me through all the terrible things that you do.

You are so immature, and you are not even that great,

And I think I need to start thanking the universe for not allowing us to date.

Because this whole time I thought I wasn’t good enough for you,

But I finally realized that this was not true.

This whole time you were never good enough for me,

And I wish it didn’t take me this long to finally see.

That I tried to be nice, and that was why I ended up getting cursed,

And it took me so long to realize that you really are the worst.

I don’t know why you felt the need to play with my heart,

And I don’t know why you couldn’t just be honest with me from the start.

You still have a lot of growing up to do,

And that was why it was never going to work out between me and you.

Because for some reason you put yourself above everyone,

And that was when I finally realized that I needed to be done.

You are no longer worth my effort or my time,

And I am so happy that I never had the opportunity to call you mine.

Because I tried to give the good guy a chance, and look where they got me,

And I feel like for the first time in four years I am finally free.

Because this whole time you got pleasure out of knowing that you fucked with my mind,

And you wanted to ensure that I focused only on you, and that I was blind.

And that I was not going to find someone else like you,

But I finally realized that that is not true.

You wanted to play games,

Well I am here to finally show you that I can do the same.

It is my turn to show you how good I can shine when you are not around,

And when I am successful, I will remember how you kicked me when I was down.