I was drunk in Mexico
When I found, on accident, that my friend was leaving my company
I described him as the most loyal person for years
And had an understanding of trust - if you want to leave, tell me
I will support your decisions - what friend would not?
I found from another he was leaving
It cut me and my soul with betrayal and sadness
Stole from me something I’ll never get back
Trust and Faith and Naivety
And so I ran from my head and
I drank and drank and drank more tequila
The shots were free and flowed as such
I was lost and I couldn’t find my way to my posh room
So I asked a friend there for the way and found it finally
After some time and help to being alone
My way to destiny was closer found
My thoughts took me to a dark place where
Mental creatures lurked hard, sinister and real
So dark that there didn’t seem to be an escape so
I put on some music and sang but song words did not free me
My thoughts turned darker and darker
Escape was elusive
I sat on the balcony and I cried and cried and cried
They say you can manifest your reality
That night, I manifested and envisioned jumping off
The balcony and lying dead in a pool of blood
My arms and legs contorted
My head canted sideways looking at my flight path
I was so close to turning off the lights
That night